I Wish It Would Rain Down...

Maybe it's a funny to thing to remember in the beginning of February when it's still cold in Utah and there is snow on the ground outside...but my thoughts are drawn now to times I would go out and dance in the rain in the spring and summer.

I remember times when in the middle of the night I would realize it was raining. And I'd open my basement window, push out the screen, and crawl out onto the wet grass. And there in the backyard, in bare feet and wearing a nightgown, I would dance and spin as the rain came down.

It was my moment of freedom, my moment of solace, my moment of being absolutely true to me. No cares in the world, no worries about what other people were thinking of me. It was just me with the night and the rain and the grass. I belonged there.

There was only one time I can recall where I did not dance in the rain by myself. And that was with my friend Kim (and a guy named Todd?). I don't know how it started, but I somehow suspect I was actually the instigator. I know I was at Kim's house with a bunch of her friends and the rain was pouring down outside. In fact there was rain and thunder too. Somehow Kim and I ended up on her lawn in the pouring rain while the rest of our friends watched on, questioning our sanity. The gutter was flooding with water and we splashed around in it, soaking our jeans. Rain glistened in our hair and on our skin. At last we had enough of our fun and walked up to the porch. I still remember the way her mom looked in shock as she opened the door and saw her daughter, and as she stammered in an almost child like voice, "K-Kimmy, you're-you're all wet! I-I-I don't like it!" I thought it was too funny.

That night is probably one of my favorite memories I have with a friend. Again in that moment I had no cares in the world and no worries about what other people were thinking of me. I knew they thought I was crazy and I didn't care. I was in love with life and that one other person was sharing that joy with me. We had joy and fun and total freedom. We belonged in that moment to the rain and the night and the lightning and thunder. We belonged not to others good opinions of us...but we were in a place, a moment, of belonging.

I want to remember that I don't need rain to obtain those kinds of moments again. It is not something that comes with the change in the weather...it comes from a place from within.

Let the rain fall down
Everywhere around you
Give into it now
Let the day surround you
You don't need a reason
Let the rain go on and on