My "Doodle It 100 Times Challenge"

I have come up with a challenge for myself based on something I read about on an artists blog. She said she will draw 100 versions of an icon/element as it helps her explore variations, ideas and to grow, etc. So I decided I am going to doodle various objects and doodle 100 of each object.

It kind of reminds me of when I used to do Muay Thai kickboxing and I had to kick the heavy bag 100 times with each leg. That was a challenge.

So, my first object is mushrooms. I have now doodled 17 mushrooms....and I am going crazy. I actually want to scream. (I know, that's silly.) I am not used to doodling. I am not used to drawing on paper. Ack!

It doesn't seem like it would be that hard. But I knew when I read that post on that artists blog that this would be a serious challenge for me. Even though I am not taking it too seriously because I am just trying to do simple doodles rather than draw something I would actually try to use in actual art or such. I am just being sloppy and messy and not putting too much thought into it (or rather *trying* not to put too much thought into it would be more accurate)...but it is such a struggle for me. It is strangely pushing myself way out of my comfort zone.

I like drawing vector art because it is easier for me to fix, tweak, adjust things to how I like it. I can delete things if they are really bad or make little adjustments using the "handles and nodes" on the lines I've drawn to adjust them to "just right" or "close enough." Paper on the other hand isn't as forgiving. Drawing on paper with a pen is even less so. I am trying to open myself up to letting go and just *do*. I think one reason why I don't doodle is I don't like to see my "mistakes" on paper. I don't like seeing that record of something I drew that doesn't look very good. Even though it is just a doodle and isn't supposed to look good. It makes me feel raw.

This is a really crappy picture, but here is what I have so far...17 or 18 mushrooms (I've done some clusters of mushrooms and I am counting each cluster as just one mushroom). Not only is the picture crappy, but you can tell that most of my doodles are crappy too. Which in a way, for me is kind of the point...to let go of perfection and "just do something." I spend too much time not doing things because I want to do things "a certain way"...maybe not perfectly, but to a certain level of standards I have in my own mind that is high enough that I quit before I start or shortly after I start and so I never finish. I am at a point in my life that finishing is more important than doing a good job. Once I get used to finishing things, and not be so intimidated by finishing things...then I can focus more and the level of skill and care involved.

As hard as this challenge is for me, even though I have just started it, I am also already loving it. I really am liking the push it gives me. It reminds me of when I have really been pushed in the past and made breakthroughs in what I can accomplish...those events have been rare in my life and I cherish them. It is up to me to make so I have more opportunities to experience events like them more often. Push myself beyond my own boundaries...even if it's just with simple doodles.